Sisterhood in Islam

The masjid had cliques in it based on language and culture and many sisters grouped themselves accordingly... but at least when I gave the greeting it was for the most part returned. I use to take my Qur'an and go to the prayer room, sit in the circular hallway on a chair near a window and read; it was so soothing and peaceful. Sometimes I would stay for prayer. Often I would go and come and speak to perhaps only a brother passed in the hallway where the bathrooms are located for wudu. But this kept me grounded and feeling as if I was a part of the Muslim community.

When I was very ill from April through August of this year not one Muslim in my local community came by to read Qur'an or offer dua. Not one meal was given to my family to help out. You see, many Muslimah are kept at home and don't know other Muslimah. We don't know who is sick and in need in the community. We don't know which sisters do not have a husband in their home and who need help with their sons for male mentoring and guidance.

During this awful time, sister friends from other States and countries telephoned me, sent me cards and even small gifts to cheer me and let me know I was loved and their sister. Without the Internet I would be without any Muslim contact. There are sisters like me who are disabled and cannot get out much. We are not visited nor are we invited to the homes of other sisters. I have been Muslim for five years and in that time have been invited to the home of two sisters locally. I have received many nice invitations to visit sisters overseas but cannot travel. The intentions offered are almost as good as being able to visit. Last year at Eid a family promised to come and get me to take me to Eid prayer where all Muslims had gathered. I got ready and waited, but they did not call or come for me. I said Eid prayer alone in my prayer room at home.

I do not feel sorry for myself nor has my belief in Islam been shaken It is people who have failed me and many others like me and not Islam. Islam is the truth and light by which we can reach Jannah. Regardless of what other Muslims do or don't do… I hold fast to the rope of Islam. This is not so for many reverts who become disillusioned with Muslims who are weak and thoughtless. These reverts mistake the lack of caring as part of Islam. I am always saddened when I know of a revert turning away from Islam, but frankly am not surprised.

Much has been written recently about the failings of our men folk. I have also written about this, but seldom do we Sisters in Islam take responsibility for our own failings. It is much easier to see the failings of the men and not look to ourselves.

When is the last time you asked your Imam for a list of the needy in your community? When is the last time you visited a sick sister, a shut in sister? When is the last time you opened your home and invited a lone Muslimah to share dinner and your life with her?

Community services for the sick, poor and needy are deplorable in many, many Muslim communities and primarily because the women are left out of the management of the masjid business and finances. Many masjid leaders won't allow or refuse to encourage women to vote on business matters of the masjid. This is not true in all masjids and some parts of the USA are better than others for female inclusion.

It is becoming more difficult for me to see and also type. I am often transposing letters in words and missing key strokes. One day I know I will not have the communication of the Internet. Then it will be Allah and me. I do not look forward to this time in my life but it is coming. I know there must be sisters like me who have already faced this and are living it.

So think on this each of you. Perhaps you will be blessed not to have such a circumstance in your life... and if so... you should be wanting for your sisters what you have for yourselves instead of holding others responsible for what you may or may not do as a Muslimah and Sister in Islam. You can take hadith, aya and such out of context and make it seem reasonable for any intent or purpose.... but the life of the Prophet (pbuh), the history of his wives and the Companions and early Muslims are the best teachers of correct conduct and manners of Muslims. The Prophet’s (pbuh) common sense, moderation, kindness and gentle good manners speak volumes in the hollowness that is present in the lives of many in the Muslim community today.

Islam is the religion of ease. It is human beings who make it difficult.

These are my opinions based on my personal experiences and being Muslim. They are not intended to bring any harm or offend.